Leaving Seabrook Baptist Church

Jesus making wine from water in The Marriage at Cana, a 14th-century fresco from the Visoki Dečani monastery (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

I am not sure when I started to get disenchanted with my time at Seabrook Baptist Church.  There are two things that stand out in my mind as I look back on things.

The first thing was when the pastor of our church said a few things that I felt were insulting to my (or our collective) intelligence.  Now, keeping in mind that this is a Baptist church and one of their tenets in no alcohol.  At the time I was not drinking.  It was one of the periods in my life when I abstained from consuming alcoholic beverages.  I have never felt that the consumption of alcohol was a sin, but the excess consumption of it (getting drunk) is, not to mention that the consumption of alcohol can lead one to lower their inhibitions and do things that are sinful.

During one particular sermon, the pastor was teaching on the passage in the Gospel of Mark where Jesus talks about how one would not put new wine in old wine skins otherwise the skins would burst.  The pastor made the argument that the new wine was not wine, but was instead grape juice.  To me, that stretched the boundaries of logic.  After all, Jesus was often accused of being a glutton and a drunkard.  To me, I logically came to the conclusion that Jesus did in fact partake of wine. 

Perhaps the biggest thing that happened, was due to some things that were happening in my personal life.  When I began going to Seabrook, I was working my way through college at a small, local grocery chain.  It was a union shop, but had a much lower pay scale that the other major chains in the area.  At the time, I was making $5 per hour, which was a good bit better than minimum wage at the time.  I didn't have a lot of money, but I had enough for what I needed.

One of the larger chains in the area, Memco Stores, was getting ready to open two new stores in the area, one very close to where I lived.  They were a part of the larger union contract.  I was able to get a job with them.  I more than doubled my previous hourly rate.  On top of that, they offered double time as a premium if you worked on Sundays or holidays.  My previous job only offered time and a half.  I started signing up for a lot of Sundays.  It was over $20 per hour.

With my new job, I started to not attend services at Seabrook as often.  Sadly, my new found gold mine of cash wasn't to last very long.  The company decided that they could no longer afford to pay the high union wages they were required to pay under the union contract and decided to leave the area.  Why they would go to the expense of opening two new stores and then decide to close them and all other stores two months later still baffles me.

I believe it was a Saturday night and I had just finished my shift.  After counting out my register, the managers informed me that I would no longer be needed.  I knew it was coming, but I was still stunned.  I went out to my car and it wouldn't start.  The battery had died.  I had to have my father come out to help me.  It was a rough night.  I had just lost a good paying job, and on top of that I had to buy a new battery for my car.  So, I did something I hadn't done in a couple of years.  I bought some beer.

Later that night, or maybe the next night, I was talking on the phone to one of my closest friends at church.  I told her what had happened and about buying and drinking some beer.  Instead of being compassionate and encouraging, her response was, "Oh, Richard," in a very condescending and disappointed tone like I had committed some grievous sin.  I pretty much stopped attending the church after that.  Perhaps if she had encouraged me to put it behind me and move forward things would have been different.  As it was, I was very hurt.

In retrospect, it was wrong for me to let somebody else's disappointment in what I did affect my attitude towards the church.  Unfortunately, I am a flawed individual living in a world of flawed individuals.  It is also a behavior that I have repeated at subsequent times in my life, but I am getting ahead of myself.  I will get to more of that when I talk about the next phase of how I got to where I am today.

A New Experience

KJV Bible (Photo credit: knowhimonline)

It has been about 22 years since I attended a church on a regular basis.  In the past year, I have been spending a lot of time on my own, reading the Bible and books with Christian subject matter, listening to the various teaching ministries on Family Talk Radio on Sirius. I have attended a few churches, but not on a consistent basis, as a search for a new church home.

There have been two churches that I have attended on a regular basis and been a member.  Both have been Baptist churches.  The first one was Seabrook Baptist Church which I mentioned in previous posts.  The other was Grace Baptist Church here in Bowie, Maryland.  In future posts, I will talk a little bit about my experiences at both of those churches.

In my search for a new church, I have visited a few different denominations.  One of the things that I have been looking for is a church that has an early worship service on Sunday mornings.  An earlier service works better for me because I tend to wake up fairly early, even on the weekends.  This morning, I was out of bed around 6 am.

So far in my search, I have not found a place that I could say definitively that I wanted to make my new church home.  Similarly, there has not been any place that I have outright decided to eliminate, though I am pretty close to eliminating one church.  It is tough because that church lines up more closely with my theological beliefs, however the worship service doesn't quite give me what I am looking for.

Up to now, I have stayed away from Baptist churches even though that is what my primary church background has been.  The reason I have stayed away from Baptist churches is because of some of my past experiences with them which I will relate in some later posts.  Today, however, I decided to try the Baptist church that is closest to my home because they have an 8:30 am worship churches.

It was at this church that I experienced something that I had never experienced in my previous associations with Baptist churches.  The associate pastor of the church came over to introduce themselves to me.  Nothing unusual about that, but was unusual is that this associate pastor was a woman.  The Baptist churches that I have been a part of in the past held steadfastly to the belief that a woman could not hold that position within the church.

Another thing that I noticed was in the church bulletin for the day's worship activities.  The bulletin listed the names of all the deacons of the church.  Once again, I noticed that several of the deacons (actually, I should say the vast majority) were women.  Again, the two previous churches that I belonged to only had men in the role of deacons.

I will say that one of the things that I did like about the church was that it was very racially diverse.  I have heard it said that Sunday morning worship hour is often still the most segregated hour in the country.  The attendees of this particular service were split almost equally between white and black worshipers.  In fact, the female associate pastor is African American, while the lead pastor is a white man.

I was very impressed by the lead pastor.  Instead of standing behind the pulpit, he stood on the floor and delivered his message.  What was most impressive, is that he delivered his sermon without the use of any notes.  His delivery was smooth and very structured.  The associate pastor told me after the service that during the early service, he usually does not speak from behind the pulpit as it is a more relaxed service, but he does preach the 11 am service from behind the pulpit as it is a more formal service.

Another thing about the church that was different, at least to me, is that it seemed that they were a bunch of huggers.  After the service, the associate pastor gave me a hug and we chatted for a while.  She seems very nice.  Then after we finished our conversation, as I went to leave the church, another woman came up to me and gave me a big hug and thanked me for attending the service.

I have not decided whether or not I will go back to the church I went to today.  Part of me wants to, but another part of me isn't sure.  The church is conveniently located, and I like that they have an early service.  Still, another part of me wonders about them having so many women in positions of leadership within the church.  There is no doubt that the Bible teaches that women play an important role in the gospel. Still there are those verses that say that women should not be a teacher or in authority over men in the church, not to mention that is what I have experienced in my previous church lives.  What are your thoughts on women in a leadership position within the church today versus what is taught in the Bible?